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Hi, this is my blog for all sorts of pro-life news, statistics, stories, and personal ventings. I am a wife and mother, as well as a nursing student. I I truly believe that abortion has failed women, and will continue to do so as long as it is legal.


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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Let's Talk About Sex ->Baby

Though the topic makes some a bit squeamish, it is ridiculous for me to blog about abortion without mentioning a bit about how babies appear in the womb.

We all know of the birds and the bees, and the basics of human reproduction, but it seems like more and more society has forgotten what meaningful sex actually entails. While browsing my archives I found the following statement in response to a post about why certain men "heart" birthcontrol.

I am female and love BC. I enjoy having sex with my husband without the worry of pregnancy. I don't mind being a sex object for him, as long as the favor is returned. Thank goodness for tubal ligations!


I think this comment sums up the worldly view of sex. Sex becomes something where we are both taking from each other, and giving nothing. When sex becomes nothing more than an act of self gratification, it is easy to edge responsibility out of the equation.

When sex is viewed as something where each partner is giving of themselves in order to share the pleasures of the act, there is a mindset of cooperation and love. Sex where both partners are using the other as a way to physical satisfaction, however, leads only to emptiness at the end of the act.

Neither party has given any of themselves willingly, but rather allowed themselves to be used as some sort of strange deal in which both parties become willing sex toys. While there is cooperation at some level, there is no love. One does not love, nor respect a Real Doll.

This respectless sex, the norm in extramarital relations, is punctuated by the fact that there is biological giving of self is obstructed by some means. This hollow experience leads people searching for more meaningful sex, but ultimately leads to nothing but more of the same type of emptiness.

Though we try, it is impossible to separate sex from reproduction, and occasionally a man gives more of himself than he intended. The woman, who never respected the man she used, naturally thinks very little of this reproductive predicament. The man, never respecting the woman, feels quite cheated that his sperm betrayed him and impregnated someone he saw as only a tool for his own needs.

A child is never a welcome addition to a union of selfishness. If a man views his wife as only a tool to his own enjoyment, how can see a child as a blessing of their union. In his mind, the child is an unwelcome third party incompatible with the idea that sex is an individual act with a warm body.

A child highlights the truth that sexual union must involve selfless giving. Carrying a child during pregnancy and caring for her later development are acts of selfless love. If we can not show this to our partners, how in the world could we show it to our children?

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13 Comments:

  • Lauren says things better than I ever could.

    Bravo!

    By Blogger JacqueFromTexas, at 5:04 PM  

  • *blush* You could make up a mean spread sheet of the data! ;)

    By Blogger Lauren, at 6:23 PM  

  • http://www.theologyofthebody.net/

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 9:30 PM  

  • Thanks for the link anon. It looks like I may be a bit of an evangecath as well. :)

    By Blogger Lauren, at 6:51 AM  

  • That's Jason...He was impressed by your article although he didn't comment as such. When he read it on the phone with me he said, "She sounds Catholic." :)

    Hey, woman! You, me, bubble teas and final plans for lodging at the March. "Anon" scored us some nice accomodations but we need to hammer out the details. :) Call me!

    -Jacque

    P.S. I hope I won't get in trouble for outing Jason...

    By Blogger JacqueFromTexas, at 9:48 AM  

  • Haha! We have a great Anon hook up.

    I'm super busy today til 6, but I'll try to give you a call after that. Holden has a fever :(

    By Blogger Lauren, at 10:57 AM  

  • Yeah, Anon is an awesome guy. :)

    I keep picturing him sitting up against the back of his bed, his round baby belly begging for a raspberry.

    He's the cutest thing. He shouldn't be sick, ever. What do you think it is?

    By Blogger JacqueFromTexas, at 11:40 AM  

  • Him=Holden.

    Not Anon. Anon has no baby belly...Although he's also the cutest thing. :)

    Just thought I'd clear that up...

    By Blogger JacqueFromTexas, at 11:41 AM  

  • We don't know. The doctor told us that he has no clue what is wrong, but to treat the fever and come back in two days.

    I'm not the happiest with the whole wait and see idea, but we're all praying that it is nothing.

    Please pray for him!

    By Blogger Lauren, at 5:11 PM  

  • I hope he feels better!

    I, too, read this post and thought of JP II`s Theology of the Body. (Yes, I am a dissenting Catholic who uses contraception, but I do try very hard to understand exactly what it is I`m dissenting from.) My Buddhist husband would suggest that perhaps you were Catholic in one of your past lives.

    By Blogger L., at 11:28 PM  

  • Wanting to follow god's very first command ("Be fruitful and multiply", Genesis 1:28) and Jesus' example ("Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them") does not make you a Catholic. It is hard--I know--when it seems that everyone around you wants to have precisely 2 or 3 children and then do something "important"--like teaching 20 of someone else's kids. As far as I am concerned, I'm just a Christian; I don't like the term "protestant" because I am not protesting anything, I am just trying my best to be a "little Christ." It is worth knowing that Catholics advocate withholding oneself in order to prevent the conception of children, something specifically against Paul's teaching not to withhold oneself except for prayer (and fasting, according to the KJV). According to official doctrines, this is only for "grave matters" or "child spacing" but there is no set theory on what matters are grave or how much spacing is permitted. Perhaps you should do some research into the "quiverfull" philosophy. There are also many others that have similar beliefs but do not subscribe to that particular label.

    I only wish that I could find them in real life and not just on the internet.

    By Blogger Young Christian Woman, at 9:00 AM  

  • Young Christian Woman,

    I used to beleive exactly like you, being emphatically anti-birth control and yet emphatically evangelical/fundamentalist/noncatholic (I always call myself protestant since I'm not offended by it). What happened was I became to disturbed to see that the protestants being pro-birth control was not a doctrinal difference! All churches prior to the sexual revolution all agreed that birth control was intrinsically evil. My question then became: Did God's opinion change? Or did certain sects cower to public opinion on matters of morality? It's obvious that the latter is true, especially since most protestant denominations have a platform SUPPORTING abortion (sans Orthodox and Southern Baptists). That's a moral issue all Christians should agree on.

    So then I thought: if the Catholics have held true in this aspect while the protestants strayed, what areas also have the protestants submitted to societal pressure? The more I studied the Bible and submitted to Christ's leanings, the more I agreed with the Catholic church.

    I don't see why you're disturbed that that Lauren would see this as a Catholic mindset when the church is the only major entity to promote it in light of 30,000 protestant sects that say otherwise. My mom invented the term evangicath and I described myself that way for years. There's nothing wrong with being Catholic.

    By Blogger JacqueFromTexas, at 2:20 PM  

  • This blog is so old I'm sure no one will read it but anyway......
    I have a 4 1/2 year old a 2 1/2 year old and a 1 year old. I got pregnant only 2 months after going off bc the first year we were married. I only had 2 periods between my first 2 children and because I was nursing my 2nd, I didn't get my period back and never did, I got pregnant with baby #3 without ever even having a period. Baby #3 is now 1 year old and I have been on bc since he was 6 months. I was a basketcase for those first 6 months, just knowing that I was gonna get pregnant. I'm sorry that you have problems conceiving, I sincerely am, but I have problems NOT conceiving!!! LOL! Just as some people are 4'9 and some are 6'9, everybody's body is different, not better or worse but different. My husband and I are extremely fertile and I am so grateful for that. My sister had 6 miscarriages in a row before they found what was wrong and could correct it. Now she has 4 and can have no more because they were all c-sections. They wanted 6 kids or so. For me, personally, I can barely handle the 3 I've got. Just like how I said everybody's body is different, so are people's emotional capabilities. I LOVE my children so much I can't comprehend it sometimes, but I am also realistic and mature enough to realize that for me to be pregnant right now would be irresponsible and detrimental to my family. Let me clarify, the child itself would not be detrimental, it would be loved and adored and cared for!! But the impact of the pregnancy and care of that child wold take away from my ability to be a good mother to the children I already have!!!!! I have a complication of pregnancy that I get every time, I won;t go into the details but it makes my pregnancies extra difficult and emotionally draining. I hate the way bc works and yes, I know EXACTLY how it works!! And I also know that I had to choose between doing something that I don't like or being irresponsible with my body and another human beings body. So, I don't plan on being on bc forever, we may want another in a few years, who knows. But for right now, me being on bc is the best option for us.
    And don't even start in about using the rhythm method, that's what we were doing when I got pregnant the first 2 times!! We joke that husband has like 10 day sperm or something!!!

    And as a side note, I would be preggo RIGHT NOW had I not gotten on bc.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:29 AM  

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