Baby. Maybe?

Alright, I wasn't going to post anything til we knew for sure, but since I'm going through this I thought I'd make all of you go through it as well. Muahaha. For those of you who don't care to read about ovulation and luteal periods, suffice it to say that I might be pregnant, check back in a week.


For those of you who have tried to conceive and found it a bit frustrating, this post is for you. Don't worry, I won't talk about the actual conception!

To start off, I've taken two tests. The first was a "spontaneous, middle of the afternoon test that I didn't expect to come back positive...But what if it does" type test. It was negative. Because I definitely feel pregnant, and am even starting to look a little pregnant, I wasn't discouraged.

The second test I just took about 5 minutes ago because I took my last positive pregnancy test in the middle of the night and I figured it might be good luck. The results were infuriatingly inconclusive. The line telling me I did the test right came back with flying, vivid colors. The line telling me I was pregnant however came back so thin and light that if you blinked once you would have missed it. I had to call my husband in to make sure it actually existed and I wasn't just creating it with wishful thinking. It was the punyist mockery of a line I've ever seen.

So I'm taking that as a "maybe". A little more hope than had there been no line, but not much.

Here's a little back ground information to help my readers stay in the guessing game with me :)

1-I have the most erratic cycles imaginable. 33 days here 40 days there 20 days the next month, you get the idea. I NEVER know if I'm "late" so I pretty much test every month.

2-I have a handy dandy ovulation microscope that I use religiously so I know I at least hit the ovulation mark.

3- I feel pregnant and some of my old stretch marks seem to be gearing up for old times and making some new friends. Also the old reliable indications like peeing a whole lot and having breasts that turn magically to rock are also in full swing.

4- The first test I took with my son came back negative, and the second positive. However, at the time of the test I was pregnant with twins and it still took about a week from the first test to give positive results.

5- I'm spotting just a little bit, but did so with my son as well.

6- And here's the only bit of information working against me...Because of my erratic cycle, I always think I'm pregnant. So much so that it's a joke. This time however is noticeably different as evidenced by my husband actually agreeing with me.

Anyways, seasoned mommies what do you think? Am I going crazy or does that pathetic line and my returning stretchy friends mean there's a new member of the family? Whatever it means, you can all join me on the ride.

Oh yeah and one more piece of evidence...The picture above isn't from my actual test, I didn't think my line would photograph. So I went searching for a faint inconclusive pregnancy test image and found this one. It just happens to be the same brand of test that I used. Coincidence? I think not!

Prayers for my Father's Family.

This is actually a bit late because I've been away from the computer for a few days but I have a prayer request for all of my readers.

My father and his wife just welcomed a beautiful baby girl into the world. My step-mother is in her 40's so we were all a bit worried, but she is fine. Holden's new aunt(haha!) was delivered via emergency c-section.

However, during his wives labor, my father received a phone call that his oldest brother Mark had passed away. The funeral was on the day they brought home their darling little girl. Please pray for my father, my grandparents, and all of my aunts and uncles. Mark wasn't married and didn't have any children but he was well loved by his family and friends.

Pray for my husband!

By the time anyone reads this I'm sure my husband will be home safe and sound but... His boss just called me to tell me Oliver hasn't gotten to work yet. He left hours ago. I called his cell phone but no one answered. I forgot to ask his boss what his phone number is and I am now unable to contact anyone. No one has contacted me. I am out of my mind with worry and I just ask that everyone prays that my husband is safe.

Update! He's fine, he just lost his wallet and was stationed in the security office. However, I have a major complaint about his employer, they called me telling me my husband had not come in, left no number to return the call, and then didn't call me to tell me he was ok. So I worried for 6 hours with absolutely no way to find out anything.

Open Comments

After much consideration I've decided to open up comments from anonymous individuals in this blog. I realize that some people would like to comment but feel inhibited by the required registration, so I am allowing non-blogger individuals to comment. To avoid spamming I am also implementing a word verification system.

If I receive any threatening comments they will be immediately deleted and commenting will go back to blogger members only. I hope that this will open more lines for communication and sharing of ideas. I ask everyone to be courteous and show respect for this blog, fellow readers, and me.

I also ask that if someone posts as anonymous they use some sort of monicker within their post so they can be more easily addressed.

I hope this works out!

Pro-choice Sidewalk Counselors?

There were some comments in my last post regarding pro-choice sidewalk counseling. I started to think about the idea and I think it could be very useful. While there are quite a few "pro-abortion" individuals who would NOT be helpful, someone who is truly pro-choice and can see that abortion is not the best option for all women may be helpful in the fight. I know most choicers would sooner die than stand outside of an abortion clinic(well, at least on the pro-life side of the street) but I think there is a place for compassionate choicers on the sidewalk.

Thoughts?

A Response to Choice.

Here's the thing, you can justify it with whatever makes you sleep at night, but at the end of the day you still killed your own child. Call it a fetus or an embryo or a clump of cells, it doesn't change the fact that you knowingly killed your own child for personal gain.

You can spin it as some sort of empowerment, but again, at the end of the day you are no better than anyone else who kills for profit. Just because society sanctions the killing doesn't make it any less horrendous.

Abortion is not a "woman's right". No one has the right to kill another person, not a woman, not the state, no one. We live in a time where life seems almost meaningless, but it is so sacred.

People complain about war, about poverty and suffering, but how in the world could we expect anyone to value life if mothers don't even value the life of their children? We have become so flipant, so callous about death, but yet even the most hardened seem to cringe when the obvious fallout occurs.

I know that we are all selfish, that we all sin and all flounder, yet it is amazing to me that our selfish nature has become so overwhelming that it has penetrated the bond of mother and child.

I ask you this. What does the pro-life side gain by extinguishing abortion? What do I personally gain? When you tear down the strawman of "controlling women" what is left for me to gain? I gain nothing, but our children, your children gain everything. The gain life and hope, for where there is life there is hope.

What does the pro-choice side gain by keeping abortion? Each individual man and woman gain an out from responsibility. They are able to indulge in self fulfilling activities without the worry or care of the child they bring into the world. They indulge their selfish natures. Where there is abortion there is an out, and we so desperately want that out.

Now, not only are we indulging our selfish natures with abortion, we are indulging our vanity with human blood. We are profiting on others sins, and literally buying a fountain of youth with the slaughter of the young.

Please, stop the killing. It will be our downfall.

I'm tired.

I'm so tired right now. Not physically, though that too, but rather tired of humanity. I need my faith restored. My son is sick, I'm sick, and my husband isn't feeling well either. We are all just surviving.

I just can't deal with human nature right now. I am so sick of the abortion mindset. I can't even explain how much it disturbs me that mothers kill their own children. I mean, some days I can deal with the horror, I can deal with life. Today I can't. I can't deal with things. I'm going to hold my son and try to come back to terms with this.

Not feeling well

I'm feeling a bit blah today, so I probably won't make a big post. I'll be back soon :)

This Is What A {pro-lifer} Looks Like!

"Children Living, please. is a blog run by lifers about what else? Abortion. Pro-life and proud we aim to educate, focus attention on different abortion-related issues, and get people to actually think.

Pro-life has been mucked up by cultural stereotypes. We're no more sixty year old ladies praying Rosaries outside clinics then choicers are a bunch of post-Vietnam hussies. The reality of the abortion issue today is that both sides are of varied people and ideas. Unfortunately, choicers have the comfort of calling themselves the liberals, so naturally, they're louder. But on the contrary, we're spunky and angry and by contrast we have a lot to say.

Whether it's food for thought or just the comfort of knowing you're about to read an article by someone of the same opinion, plop down, take a load off, and pour into what we have to say. They do have a choice, let's make sure they make the right one. KP"

I would like to introduce to you all a fabulous blog formed by Pro-life 18-24 year olds who DO NOT fit the stereotype of your average pro-lifer. They are gay men and pagans with more than a few feisty Roman Catholics thrown in for good measure. They all are strongly convicted to their calling. They have been tested by some of the most hateful and mean spirited choicers one could imagine.

This group of bloggers offers a different view of the pro-life cause, but one just as sincere. I truly hope that they can round up a large following, because they are just "that good". Drop by their blog, leave them a message, and see what a young pro-lifer really looks like.

http://childrenliving.blogspot.com

Pregnancy Miracle!

My cousin in law Cassie just called me to tell me something miraculous. She is pregnant with her 4th child(though she lost her first to miscarriage) and has had quite the rocky start.

Shortly after getting the positive pregnancy test and being told she was 8 weeks along, Cass started to bleed. She went to the hospital and was told that though there was a sac, their was no child. She was told to come back in 5 days to be sure of the findings. 5 days past, and another ultrasound showed no heartbeat. Cassie had been praying for a miracle and because the doctors assured her that her life was in no danger by continuing the pregnancy and awaiting the inevitable miscarriage, she decided to wait one more week before having a D&C.

Her church prayed, and she prayed and (drum roll please) when she had her final ultrasound a heartbeat was found! My readers will remember that the same thing happened to me during my pregnancy with Holden. I told her a few months ago of my story, which made her question her last miscarriage. Praise God that this child was "discovered" and was saved!

God is so wonderful. So wonderful!

Praise God, Amy is in remission

I've posted about Amy before in my thankful thursday. Her blog is at
Wilhoite Prayer Blog. Her cancer is officially in remission. I urge everyone to go to her blog and read from the beginning. Her faith through all of this is incredible. The glory she gives God through her struggle is so amazing. Praise God for delivering her through this and praise God for allowing me to see her courage.